Often times clients have mentioned to me one toxic person in their life, or even several- be it a coworker, a previous romantic partner/spouse, or even a family member, or even several family members.Often times I hear "I just don't know what to do" Or, "Why did they do this or do that?" What was the purpose?
For these toxic relationships, my guides showed me a very distinctive image: A tandem bike in the mud- you and the individual are riding the tandem bike, however the bike is stuck in mud. You as the passenger may be aware as to why the bike is in the mud or you may not. Regardless the toxic individual leading is getting most of the muck up in their face, and you're getting any of the residues that aren't hitting them. The person in front is confused, can't see, and as a result lacks general direction, and you being on the back seat, are just on for the ride. And to make things worst the faster you both pedal to get out of the mud, the deeper the bike sinks into the mud. Each of you go nowhere.stuck.
You think ok, I can go back, get a rope and pull them out, or even better I will help them push their bike out of the mud- the solutions to help reach out and help this person zing through your mind. However the only issue that is left standing is How the hell did they end up in the mud in the first place? How come this individual steered you guys off the path the first time? Why did we even use a tandem bike? Maybe they shouldn't be leading the way after all? So then you think, well I'll lead the bike! They can ride the back seat! Or even better we won't ride a tandem bike!
So you approach the person and say, "Hey, I'll take the lead and I'm pretty sure I can get us another bike."
Several Things happen: 1)You lead, yet you still have to question Why this individual couldn't lead the way? Breeding an eventual distrust and questioning 2) They get their own bike but can't keep up with you so eventually they'll insist on the tandem bike.
3)You bring them a bike, yet they insist on still wanting to ride the original tandem bicycle AND lead the way. 4) They give some reason as to why the tandem bicycle makes more sense. 5) You realize no solution is going to be good enough and you're back to square one- them in the lead on a tandem bike eventually back in the mud. A never ending exhausting cycle. The mud is the person's own issues and they are the only ones who can get themselves out.
This is how my guides have portrayed to me the cycle of toxic relationships. Eventually, when you become tired of going around and around and around literally or figurativley spinning your wheels on someone elses issues in mud going absolutely nowhere - you simply get off the bike- You just "know"that riding this tandem bike is really shitty- the cycle is broken. Almost.
And I say almost because it dawned upon even in my own personal life I've spun my little hamster wheel of a mind even after getting off the tandem bicycle Actually its amazing how much mind power one uses to question with Why? What's the purpose of this person's toxic behavior? Sure, I eventually find some learning life lesson value in it, but I'm human and just want to know the heck WHY? But then you spend so much circling in your own mind Why, why, why, why, why? And you waste time not finding your own new improved bicycle.
After much discussion with friends, family, and clients and deep introspection- I realized that we as humans desire to know the Why- and the WHY is truly translates to the intention.
What was the intention behind the person and/or the actions?
To speak my truth and speak it clearly, you probably will never really know the their true intention. You can literally expend more energy (if only these translated into calories) than necessary and spin your wheels wondering Why- and you get the same place you started- NOWHERE.And this occurs for several reasons 1) Most important You will never BE them AND ITS NOT YOUR JOB TO FIGURE IT OUT 2) Often times the toxic individuals themselves rarely know their own intentions, they have no idea how they ended up in the mud- usually due to a lack of purpose and direction. 3) Or even if they claim to know, their true intentions usually are even more deeply rooted than they realize- and they have yet to draw awareness to the root of the issue, or have yet to explore the root in order to heal.
And more importantly for myself, I couldn't expend anymore energy as to how the bicycle got stuck in the first place- I've come to understand that often times the
letting go isn't just the letting go of the stuff, the individual, or the material stuff but also the the WHY OF YOUR OWN MIND.
By releasing and letting go of our own theorizing and Why-ing- we begin to move ahead even faster. Not only are you able get off the back seat of the toxic person AND the constant questioning (the more time you spend questioning, you waste time finding your own new cool bicycle) find your own bicycle, reorient
yourself back to the main strip of pavement, and forge ahead, faster,
light, with more purpose and more direction. All. On. Your. Own.
P.S. If they catch up to you on their OWN
bicycle this is a good thing as they'll have figured out how to stay out of the mud! Till then forge ahead!
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
Thursday, November 13, 2014
Healing the Human Heart: The Epidemic of Spiritual Rationalizing
I once read a blog about a year from a lovely yoga teacher friend of mine. And in it she mentioned the concept of "Spiritual Rationalization"- the idea where there is some karmic learning lesson behind a situation or person, and by discovering this (or psycho-analyzing it till its dead and can't move) you think its supposed to make everything better, or at least make you feel better. But it doesn't make you feel better because you are still human.
You and I are spiritual beings in a HUMAN experience and body. So yes while the "Spirit" side of us understands all of the in/outs of karmic relations, balancing, what we still are is Human Beings who FEEL.
So when we have loss in our lives or struggles we may naturally feel anger, frustration, sadness, or hopeless. We may lash out and say hurtful things, vent on social media, throw things out the door, and maybe even engage in revenge like actions such as steal someones parking spot when we are aware they park there on the regular just to irritate them (Guilty as charged on all accounts)!
I'm here to tell you that FEELING is okay. You are allowed to FEEL what you do. Last time I checked we we're all HUMAN. No matter if you are the hurt one or the hurter, you are entitled to feel sad, and allowed to take the time to be sad!
For example, I was quite recenly in a romantic relationship which I knew was karmic. I 'knew' on a soul level we we're not meant to 'be'. Probably in a past-life we we're husband and wife (which is very common by the way) Intuitivley I knew. After a certain period of time, in my gut, truly I 'knew', he was for Now, but not IT.
BUT Like any human being I have free-will. And No amount of karmic contracts/lessons can change human free-will. However, human free-will can change karmic lessons/contracts!! I got exactly what I wanted, this individual, with all their baggage. Baggage that negatively effected me as well as him.
However, on a human level I soooooo wanted it to "work out". I wanted this to be IT! I was willing to force it to make it "work"- square peg round hole kind of scenario. I chose to ignore my intuition, my gut feelings, and even my close intuitive family and friends. All signs pointed "OUT" not "IN" for this romantic relationship, but I made a CHOICE...
ignore my intuition
make it work
and what I CHOSE, came with series of events to follow that I felt almost broke my heart in two. (But I am and always will be a McDonough Woman, and we're very good at survival and don't enjoy jonesing around with time-wasters).
Now naturally I also think- I can only blame myself. I chose to take a risk and make a choice.
I was angry at myself for not trusting what I already 'knew'. However, my human self felt hurt, angry, frustrated and questioning, despite all the psycho-analzying karmic-angelic signs of the universe hooplah, I need to let my human self be human!
So I'm letting people know you're allowed to feel angry and hurt.
You're allowed to be human.
Coping Tips For Humans & Earthworkers
*Write A Letter to the person, or even pet who is gone. Write a letter of appreciation, anger, or even sadness. Just put it all on paper.In the meantime,store them in a private place where you can read them, or write another. Sometimes it can be years before you're ready to do this, maybe just days. One day when you're ready to release just gently burn them (in a safe way! not crazy pyromaniac way) and either forgive, or let go, to open yourself to a new chapter.
* Clean-Up Your Social Media- Yes clean it up. Delete it if you have to. Keep your power to yourself, you'll hear faster listening to your own heart's healing vibration. Keep it positive, put a pretty picture of yourself, a rainbow, something other than you flicking off the world (because although that may be how you feel, its just not *sigh* not nice, tried and true!) My good friend called me out on this and to paraphrase, "Meredith, stop being a b*tch and take your post(s) down." Dammit friend you're right. (On 11/13/14 Meredith McD. admitted to being wrong about something. Take note.smile).
* Flower Essences- Flower Essences of Missiones from Argentina are an excellent supplement to help you work through emotionally difficult times. Bach flower remedies are also recommended. I myself have used them for anxiety as well as processing Grief and have seen a night/day difference.
* Rediscover Your True Self- Often times we get caught up in being a caregiver or romantic partner we stop doing the things that bring us Joy. Rediscover what you love! Whether that be walking, hiking, working out, cooking special dishes, coffee with friends, stalking cats in your neighborhood, fostering a pet, coloring, or playing in dirt- REDISCOVER YOU. THIS IS THE FUNNEST PART!!!
*Listen/Read to Inspirational Radio- hearing the same love songs over and over again may trigger unwanted feelings. Pop a cd of your favorite book, or inspirational speakers like Jack Canfield or Dr. Wayne Dwyer, or The Secret.
* Vocalize in the Car- Many people feel uncomfortable doing this, but it works really well! I call it primal scream therapy in the car, I wouldn't suggest doing in in rush hour. Or you can just talk out stuff to yourself in the car, yes you are talking to yourself, but it keeps your throat chakra squeeky clean!! Water suggested for this one.
*Have An Album For Your Emotions- Music is wonderful way to help us feel. Sometimes in the initial shock of something you may not really know what to feel, you just know you feel like shit. You can compile a list of angry songs, sad songs, loss songs, just songs and spend an hour or less, letting those songs evoke emotions. It actually helps bring out emotions and process them more thoroughly. Not recommended while drinking. And if you're going to cry heavily, stay home, or some other safe-place. One day you'll look back on these song sand laugh (trust me you will!)
*Sage, Sage and Sage again- you can read my blog about clearing residual energies from a few months back to learn more about Saging.
* Punch a Pillow- As much as you may want to physically assault this person for acting like a Feck-tard, you cannot, that's not okay, and just leads to more unfavorable scenarios for you. So instead punch a pillow, or invest in some hand wraps and gloves and take it out on a punching bag. This also will help with any anger and if you have skin issues this will help clear those up.
* Buy a Rose Quartz/Quartzes- The stone of unconditional love of self and others. Put them all around your house. Sleep with one under your pillow, or at your bedside.
*CUT. THE. CORDS!!!!- Read blog on etheric cord-cutting I think its under karmic relationships on my site! CUT AGAIN, CUT, CUT, CUT. THEN...
* White Light- AM and PM, when you wake up, when you pass out. Imagine white light wrapping around you in safety, protection and warmth. People are most vulnerable during stage of grief to lower negative energies!
* Pray! Pray for clarity and understanding on situation or a person, and also pray for eventual releasement and forgiveness. Pray to help you feel better.
* Time. Time is powerful concept. Just know that although the first two weeks or even months in a loss whether it be death or ending of a relationship, the more time that passes, the more processing occurs. Time really is a healer.
* Remember there is Power in the Black- My dog once told me,"Mom, there is power in the black." What she meant was there is power in our lows and our deepest darkest times (she herself was a black lab, funnily enough,let these lows be a launching pad into the light, without the dark we don't have the light.
So if you're human and you're hurting, or feeling lost, just know that all of this will pass, regardless of how bad you feel. There's no prize for healing fastest (although I think if there were to be a jackpot people would have more incentive to do so) so patient with yourself, and more importantly focus on loving yourself with proper sleep, food, contemplation/prayer, sometimes just starting with basics is all we can do at first.
In Love and Light,
Meredith McDonough
For more information on Flower Essences:
POC Elizabeth Piren
Moksha Living
1050 17th Street NW
Washington D.C. 20006
267-872-0564
Also, Shout-out to Rachel Carr for Spiritual Rationalization!!
Sunday, November 9, 2014
What Do a Psychic, a Dentist, And a College Professor all have in common?
What Do a Psychic, a Dentist, And a College Professor All Have In Common?
Now being a psychic-medium and telling people what I do for a living, especially in the DC, always gets a jump-start in the conversation. I now understand that this question once relayed to me, will always gets the conversation flowing, tons of questions are asked, tons of questions and misconceptions are set aside and answered, more wine is poured, stories are shared, people are fascinated, and want readings right then and there, and I'm usually left feeling DRAINED and USED. I understand people are happy and curious, however I usually feel this way because its often information I would be giving to a client who is actually serious about making an appointment.
I always say No to giving readings on command, unless I feel that my guides really truly have something to let someone know something. Which is generally Never. My guides know that I want to enjoy my glass of wine and plate of cheese without being "On". I really just don't want to have a deep intellectual conversation on reincarnation while I'm double-fisting beer. My solution now has been to refer people off to books that they can read. Eventually one day it'll be this blog into a book!
So Let me get the clear point across: Psychics are like Dentists and College Professors. Would you approach your dentist and ask him to check for cavities in the middle of party? Probably not. Would you ask your college professor as he is out having coffee with a colleague, if he could quickly check your grade and let you know if you passed last Friday's quiz?
More than likely NOT. Basically we have ZERO desire to perform "on command" just as a Dentist or Professor. I made it extra large so you cannot miss. NOPE!
I'm here to educate people that psychic readings aren't parlor trick. We're not trick monkeys. We're here to help people heal and we're following are path to make a living doing it! AND Yes we love to get paid! $$$$ (Ching Ching!) doing what we're put on this earth here to do!
So just as you would make an appointment with your college professor or dentist, psychics have office hours and prices too, and its time to respect our office hours and prices.
In Love and Light,
Meredith McDonough
If you would like to Host Meredith At Your Next Group Gathering (wedding, housewarming, birthday party, whatever event) She is more than happy to do so.
Readings are 30 minutes for $50. Advance Booking Required.
You may contact her directly at operationhighervibrations@gmail.com or 703-835-5473.
Thursday, May 8, 2014
Abundance: Let It Flow!
A person recently asked me a very direct question as
to every holistic business owner’s greatest emotional trial but also emotional
growth to running a business, “How do you
not feel bad when you have no business?”
Now, currently I’ve been sick most of this week. I
loathe sitting still. I’m a very active person I’m used to running around here and there, and constantly doing things for everyone else. So when I woke up this
morning. I thought What Now? All the things I’d normally I would do I can’t
because I’m sick. Then it hit me. To address the above question, the little (not so little nudge) to sit down
a type away hit again!
The question made me smile and Think and Remember.
It also had me look back on how much my own beliefs have grown and matured just
over the course of three years of beginning a spiritual healing practice.
Old Beliefs Vs. New Beliefs
Yes, in the beginning, there was in the technical
sense ‘no business’ which meant ‘no income’ which translated into very little
mula coming in and A LOT of mula going out! This mind-set created fear of the
future, angst of when business would be coming in, self-doubt of is this really
what I’m supposed to be doing? And the list of fear, negativity, worry, angst,
went on and on and on. I even had others tell me, “I would never make enough to
live.” And like most people in our society I began to ‘buy’ into this
mind-set. I would struggle daily with
what our society says about money and constant “lack mind-set” to my own
growing beliefs of abundance and joy and all comes about in Divine Timing, and heck
if I really want something I CAN manifest it. It was a continuous daily
struggle having to constantly buck the belief system that had been saddled onto
me from birth. So I changed my mind-set.
I began to say YES to abundance, YES there is business (even if there wasn’t)
and if you ever saw a person shouting in their car driving down the highway“ I love
money!”- that was probably me!
I’ve got news for you friends. I’m here. I’m alive. The amount of money I get on my tax-return
(which is usually ZERO) doesn’t stop my
ability to breath, to wish, to hope, to pray, and sustain faith in what I ultimately
believe is my path.
To answer the question simply, I don’t feel bad when
I have “no business”.
I feel
elated, I feel I can rest, I feel I can refocus (and even have time to sit down
and write this). I get a day off or even a few days off to reorganize my house, clean, and take a walk
in the park. All things that the universe knows that I need to do in order to
re-charge and re-boot, simply stop and smell the roses. It’s all part of the
natural ebb and flow. Some people are wondering but HOW can you feel this way?
How? I relinquished the need to control the outcome!
I can pour thousands of dollars into advertising and google adwords but at the
end of the day clients come when they are READY. TRUST in Divine Timing. When it’s time, it’s time.
If my clients come when they are not ready and at my
own insistence and my own driving it’s similar to that of forcefully opening a
flower that is still blooming. When clients are ready they come.
I know and trust that every client who walks through
my door and sits in the chair across from me i that we share some connection in some way. Even
if they cancel and reschedule three-four times to finally sit in the chair and as irritating and puzzling as that can be, that too is part of the Divine Timing process.
Divine
Timing- Letting -person, situation, object, unfold and deliver itself to you in
its OWN time and OWN way. Just letting
it flow
I don’t feel bad because in sum, I
let it flow.
Tips from Me to You (Tried and True!)
-
Pray
over your bills. Ask your Angels to help you pay them
off or intercede in the process of paying them. Do it as many times as you need
to in order to feel that you can walk away and enjoy the rest of your day
trusting that it will work itself out. I understand it’s not always easy to do
this, just practice! You’ll see the outcome soon enough!
-
Calling
in the Angels for Customer Service- Make a rather
annoying and painstaking task FUN. Ask your angels silently or out loud to put
you in touch with the person who can most help you with whatever you’re calling
about. Also ask your Angels to assist you in speaking your truth in the best
way to help get your point across!
-
Sage
your
wallet, your check book, your goods- clear all the negativity away from your
finances. Re-sage them with love and joy!
-
Bless
your payment or give payment with Good intention. Every
time you pay a bill, swipe your credit card, or even give payment to someone else
or receive payment from someone else, say a silent prayer of THANKS, even if it’s just for 2.5 seconds.
I require my clients to bless their
payment, many of them stare at me puzzled, I would rather receive a payment that
is being given with love and appreciate than resentment and anger. In the end,
it’s all energetic exchange and I certainly would rather have love floating
around in my bank account that the other stuff!
Let it flow,
Meredith McDonough MHT, RMT,
Monday, March 10, 2014
Even Healers Need Healing
Many of us have heard the saying, "doctors make the worst patients" although this belief tends to hold true in trend it isn't a balanced approach on how to lead life. More importantly it is a belief that can be easily changed. I cannot stress enough the importance of other energy workers, doctors,
nurses, therapist, caretakers, even parents to take care of themselves!
Being a hands-on healer myself it's easy to talk to my clients about the concept of balance all day, just as a medical doctor can lecture a patient on the importance of eating a balanced diet, exercise, and getting enough rest, the medical doctor and the healer both actually have to do these things too. Primarily because both can and have suffered burnout by not keeping a balance. Whether in food, rest, or time for oneself. As a result they then spend more time recovering from the burnout when they could have prevented in the first place.
For example, it amazes me when I hear how nurses and doctors operate on less than 6 hours of sleep and then get up and assist or perform a surgery. It makes me wonder do I really want this person operating on me who's running on 4 hours of sleep? Will they make a mistake because they are overworked? I know for myself I'd much rather have the doctor who has had a full night's rest! Some could argue that there aren't enough medical staff in our hospital system to allow for that. I disagree.
Many people say but my job doesn't let me do that! I can't do that! I can't take time off to go the doctor because of x,y, and z reason. I don't have time, my job won't let me!
Myself included and my clients have often told me why they cannot take care of themselves or indulge for themselves
- I don't have time.
- I don't have money.
- I have x amount of children and husband who demands my time and attention.
- My job won't let me do x,y, or z.
I'm here to tell you that a job doesn't own you or your quality of life, and if it is currently, it shouldn't. I used to work at bridal store. Certainly not a job for the faint of heart. I enjoyed some of my time working there with my fellow coworkers, but we worked really hard. We all worked all weekend. It was rare a weekend was taken off by anyone. Our average Saturday was 7-8 hours on our feet with maybe a 15 minute break, if we we're lucky. Weekends were spent working with demanding brides, bridesmaids, and mother-in-laws. The dresses that we lifted were at least 40lb-50lbs and we we're lifting 4-6 at a time, usually 4x each trip from the racks to the dressing room. We were responsible for getting the customer in and out of the dress, pitching the dress for sale, and hope that we could sell it that day. We were all exhausted from the end of the day and working on $7.50/hour with a low commission. The commission only came if your bride actually came to pick up her dress.
(If you are ever considering working in a bridal store invest in a good comfortable pair of shoes).
Well, one day in the bridal store we had a customer come in and due to lack of training I was not able to help her because I had not been trained by management to perform this particular duty. As a result, the customer became very upset with me, so I went to get my manager to handle the situation. Although the situation was resolved. The customer stated, "That she didn't know what my problem was and that I had an attitude." The customer continued to verbally slam me going on and on about how awful I was. Now, I'm a pretty peaceful person and I rarely feel the need to whip out the claws. But that day I was not taking anymore of this customer's attitude. So I replied calmly, " Ma'm I've done everything you've asked of me, I even got our manager for you to help resolve the situation. What else is it that you want? What is the real issue here?" The customer was stunned, she continued to look at me wide-eyed. She couldn't believe that I a lowly, bridal consultant would dare call her out on her bullshit.(yes even healers swear!)
My manager dismissed me to the break room, where she later came to tell me that, "I could not speak to customers that way." I understood my manager clearly but I spoke my truth and replied, "I will speak the way that is most in alignment with my dignity as a person, I have a right to stand up for myself and set boundaries for how others treat me, and if I'm not allowed to do that here, then this is not the proper work environment for me." I put in my two weeks notice a few weeks later. And I left with a sense of freedom. Moral of the story: As a healer you are also a person. Its okay to call people on their bullshit. At some point in time your job can't run the quality of your life. You are allowed to receive dignity and respect in all aspects of your life, despite what your job says. If this resonates with you its time to reclaim your power.
But why? Meredith why does this matter? I'm a healer, parent, doctor, caretaker etc- its my JOB
to give.
I agree yes part of your role here on earth as a human soul is it to give, care, and nurture, but it is also to be balanced as a human soul, which means the soul needs to learn how to receive, which means taking care of your physical, mental/emotional, and spiritual body by giving it food, rest, or any other self-indulging activity. Overall, it's also your JOB to enjoy and lead a quality of life in this human experience.
The universe is all about balance and if one continues on a path of imbalance they will eventually suffer burnout. To illustrate, this past summer I worked as a summer camp counselor for a group of 10-15, 9 year old campers. I had a blast! I had a great time with the kids. I worked M-F 8am-4pm. In addition, I saw clients all day on Sunday and Monday and Tuesday evenings. Monday and Tuesdays were 12 hour days for me. In the background of all this my mother was preparing for her big move to Hawaii, and I was also moving my office and home. As a result, I had some questions and concerns about where I was moving, so I called a good friend of mine who is a psychic for a general reading. The first thing she picked up on was the imbalance in my right hand. (Usually healers have one hand that is the "giving hand" and the other hand is the "receiving hand"). My right hand is my giving hand. Now prior to this reading over the course of a few weeks the energy stopped flowing out of my right hand. I didn't take much notice of it at first because from reading above when would I have had time to tune into myself and feel that I was imbalanced! As a healer and care provider, I was burnt out. I was in give, give, give mode 24/7. I realized I had to take time back for myself again.
Solution: She suggested I continue to take time for myself and learn how to receive and indulge for myself. And because I had gone so long without taking care of myself it took several Reiki energy sessions with a colleague to get me back in balance. I now make sure to take regular time-outs for myself, or have other healers work on me at least 2x a month. As a healer it was a lesson for me to learn how to receive again. To realize I was worthy of both of giving and receiving.
As a parent, healer, medical professional, or caretaker if you are constantly in give, give, give, mode. Where is the take for you? Where in your life do you receive? What is your simple pleasure?
When you really want to and realize it, you will make time or save money. You will set boundaries for yourself in regards to your spouse, kids, and even your job.
For parents, you are a mother or father. NOT a doormat. Don't feel guilty for taking time-outs for yourself. Don't feel guilty for setting boundaries for yourself for your own kids, its part of their learning. Children are wiser than you believe. Allow your child to see you as a person. Although I have no children yet of my own, I remember what its like to be one. Its important for your children to see you as a person, not just as parent. For example, my mother came home from work and she would often say, give me 30 minutes to myself in the bathtub, that's all I need, then I'll come back down and we can talk about your day.Now prior to this my mom would usually come home right away and start making dinner, switching laundry, checking mail, reminding me to feed the dog and do my homework, and when she was doing all this she was usually pretty irritable and begin to lash out. However, when I started seeing my mother as a person, and allowing her to have her 30 minutes in the tub she was pleasant, refreshed, and irritated by little. Needless to say it made family dinners much more enjoyable. I learned to respect my mother's time for herself. And later as a now adult, love that my mother taught me to see her as a person.
Furthermore, I have often had clients ask me in the past why I wasn't open on Saturdays and how much more business I would have if I was. And gently reminded them that I too had a family, a dog, laundry, and friends- basically I have a life! As a healer, especially an energy healer, to be at your best for yourself and your clients you will not be putting in 60-70 hours work weeks, at least not for long. I had to learn to set boundaries with my clients.
To continue our work it so important to receive for yourself and how you choose to receive is completely up to you, but take it. You are worth it.
From my above stories, the world will not crumble if you say NO and start loving yourself.
To all my fellow healers, its okay to receive now. Start today at this very moment.
Meredith
Suggested Reading:
I'm a firm believe that dis-ease generally roots from imbalances in our body, which usually begin as imbalances in beliefs or emotions. Louis L Hay author of You Can Heal Your Life has an entire index of diseases linked to the emotions or thoughts behind them. I highly recommend it as a read.
Seven Healing Chakras by Brenda Davies PhD. Mini meditations to keep the energy chakras in balance leading to greater peace of mind and calm in daily life.
Being a hands-on healer myself it's easy to talk to my clients about the concept of balance all day, just as a medical doctor can lecture a patient on the importance of eating a balanced diet, exercise, and getting enough rest, the medical doctor and the healer both actually have to do these things too. Primarily because both can and have suffered burnout by not keeping a balance. Whether in food, rest, or time for oneself. As a result they then spend more time recovering from the burnout when they could have prevented in the first place.
For example, it amazes me when I hear how nurses and doctors operate on less than 6 hours of sleep and then get up and assist or perform a surgery. It makes me wonder do I really want this person operating on me who's running on 4 hours of sleep? Will they make a mistake because they are overworked? I know for myself I'd much rather have the doctor who has had a full night's rest! Some could argue that there aren't enough medical staff in our hospital system to allow for that. I disagree.
Many people say but my job doesn't let me do that! I can't do that! I can't take time off to go the doctor because of x,y, and z reason. I don't have time, my job won't let me!
Myself included and my clients have often told me why they cannot take care of themselves or indulge for themselves
- I don't have time.
- I don't have money.
- I have x amount of children and husband who demands my time and attention.
- My job won't let me do x,y, or z.
I'm here to tell you that a job doesn't own you or your quality of life, and if it is currently, it shouldn't. I used to work at bridal store. Certainly not a job for the faint of heart. I enjoyed some of my time working there with my fellow coworkers, but we worked really hard. We all worked all weekend. It was rare a weekend was taken off by anyone. Our average Saturday was 7-8 hours on our feet with maybe a 15 minute break, if we we're lucky. Weekends were spent working with demanding brides, bridesmaids, and mother-in-laws. The dresses that we lifted were at least 40lb-50lbs and we we're lifting 4-6 at a time, usually 4x each trip from the racks to the dressing room. We were responsible for getting the customer in and out of the dress, pitching the dress for sale, and hope that we could sell it that day. We were all exhausted from the end of the day and working on $7.50/hour with a low commission. The commission only came if your bride actually came to pick up her dress.
(If you are ever considering working in a bridal store invest in a good comfortable pair of shoes).
Well, one day in the bridal store we had a customer come in and due to lack of training I was not able to help her because I had not been trained by management to perform this particular duty. As a result, the customer became very upset with me, so I went to get my manager to handle the situation. Although the situation was resolved. The customer stated, "That she didn't know what my problem was and that I had an attitude." The customer continued to verbally slam me going on and on about how awful I was. Now, I'm a pretty peaceful person and I rarely feel the need to whip out the claws. But that day I was not taking anymore of this customer's attitude. So I replied calmly, " Ma'm I've done everything you've asked of me, I even got our manager for you to help resolve the situation. What else is it that you want? What is the real issue here?" The customer was stunned, she continued to look at me wide-eyed. She couldn't believe that I a lowly, bridal consultant would dare call her out on her bullshit.(yes even healers swear!)
My manager dismissed me to the break room, where she later came to tell me that, "I could not speak to customers that way." I understood my manager clearly but I spoke my truth and replied, "I will speak the way that is most in alignment with my dignity as a person, I have a right to stand up for myself and set boundaries for how others treat me, and if I'm not allowed to do that here, then this is not the proper work environment for me." I put in my two weeks notice a few weeks later. And I left with a sense of freedom. Moral of the story: As a healer you are also a person. Its okay to call people on their bullshit. At some point in time your job can't run the quality of your life. You are allowed to receive dignity and respect in all aspects of your life, despite what your job says. If this resonates with you its time to reclaim your power.
But why? Meredith why does this matter? I'm a healer, parent, doctor, caretaker etc- its my JOB
to give.
I agree yes part of your role here on earth as a human soul is it to give, care, and nurture, but it is also to be balanced as a human soul, which means the soul needs to learn how to receive, which means taking care of your physical, mental/emotional, and spiritual body by giving it food, rest, or any other self-indulging activity. Overall, it's also your JOB to enjoy and lead a quality of life in this human experience.
The universe is all about balance and if one continues on a path of imbalance they will eventually suffer burnout. To illustrate, this past summer I worked as a summer camp counselor for a group of 10-15, 9 year old campers. I had a blast! I had a great time with the kids. I worked M-F 8am-4pm. In addition, I saw clients all day on Sunday and Monday and Tuesday evenings. Monday and Tuesdays were 12 hour days for me. In the background of all this my mother was preparing for her big move to Hawaii, and I was also moving my office and home. As a result, I had some questions and concerns about where I was moving, so I called a good friend of mine who is a psychic for a general reading. The first thing she picked up on was the imbalance in my right hand. (Usually healers have one hand that is the "giving hand" and the other hand is the "receiving hand"). My right hand is my giving hand. Now prior to this reading over the course of a few weeks the energy stopped flowing out of my right hand. I didn't take much notice of it at first because from reading above when would I have had time to tune into myself and feel that I was imbalanced! As a healer and care provider, I was burnt out. I was in give, give, give mode 24/7. I realized I had to take time back for myself again.
Solution: She suggested I continue to take time for myself and learn how to receive and indulge for myself. And because I had gone so long without taking care of myself it took several Reiki energy sessions with a colleague to get me back in balance. I now make sure to take regular time-outs for myself, or have other healers work on me at least 2x a month. As a healer it was a lesson for me to learn how to receive again. To realize I was worthy of both of giving and receiving.
As a parent, healer, medical professional, or caretaker if you are constantly in give, give, give, mode. Where is the take for you? Where in your life do you receive? What is your simple pleasure?
When you really want to and realize it, you will make time or save money. You will set boundaries for yourself in regards to your spouse, kids, and even your job.
For parents, you are a mother or father. NOT a doormat. Don't feel guilty for taking time-outs for yourself. Don't feel guilty for setting boundaries for yourself for your own kids, its part of their learning. Children are wiser than you believe. Allow your child to see you as a person. Although I have no children yet of my own, I remember what its like to be one. Its important for your children to see you as a person, not just as parent. For example, my mother came home from work and she would often say, give me 30 minutes to myself in the bathtub, that's all I need, then I'll come back down and we can talk about your day.Now prior to this my mom would usually come home right away and start making dinner, switching laundry, checking mail, reminding me to feed the dog and do my homework, and when she was doing all this she was usually pretty irritable and begin to lash out. However, when I started seeing my mother as a person, and allowing her to have her 30 minutes in the tub she was pleasant, refreshed, and irritated by little. Needless to say it made family dinners much more enjoyable. I learned to respect my mother's time for herself. And later as a now adult, love that my mother taught me to see her as a person.
Furthermore, I have often had clients ask me in the past why I wasn't open on Saturdays and how much more business I would have if I was. And gently reminded them that I too had a family, a dog, laundry, and friends- basically I have a life! As a healer, especially an energy healer, to be at your best for yourself and your clients you will not be putting in 60-70 hours work weeks, at least not for long. I had to learn to set boundaries with my clients.
To continue our work it so important to receive for yourself and how you choose to receive is completely up to you, but take it. You are worth it.
From my above stories, the world will not crumble if you say NO and start loving yourself.
To all my fellow healers, its okay to receive now. Start today at this very moment.
Meredith
Suggested Reading:
I'm a firm believe that dis-ease generally roots from imbalances in our body, which usually begin as imbalances in beliefs or emotions. Louis L Hay author of You Can Heal Your Life has an entire index of diseases linked to the emotions or thoughts behind them. I highly recommend it as a read.
Seven Healing Chakras by Brenda Davies PhD. Mini meditations to keep the energy chakras in balance leading to greater peace of mind and calm in daily life.
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Romance and Intuition: "You Know When You Know"
The metaphysical community is always talking about Love. Love this. Love that. Love everyone. Unconditional Love. You'd think we we're sitting around singing Kumbaya, perhaps wearing tie-dye shirts and contemplating the meaning and shape of a flower petal.
But what about the nitty-gritty stuff? .The deep-down romance and the soul-baring emotional talks. The ups and downs of romantic love. The love that can one moment make us say, do, and feel things that we've never felt or done before, and the next moment drive us up the wall with frustration, resentment, and anger.
Isn't it great? (smile).
But often times when I get calls to do an intuitive readings. Some of the top questions I'm asked are in regard to romantic relationships:
Is the man or woman I'm currently seeing a good match for me?
Is my soul mate out there?
Where is Mr./Mrs. Right (And why haven't they shown up yet?)
When is my significant other going to be ready to "take the next step?"
How come I keep attracting losers and/or people who are emotionally unavailable?
Is he or she going to ever change their mind on X issue or habit?
Will I ever find love?
How I come feel strongly drawn to this individual? Like a magnetic attraction?
Honestly, I can't even pretend to be a dating "expert." Like many out there, I've read my fair share of books on dating. The books tell you what to do, what not to do, when to call, when not to call, to text or not to text, who text who first, how many dates to go on per week, red flags, what it means when he says this or that, and now there is online dating which is a whole world unto itself ....it all gets very confusing and perplexing.
Also, I've had my fair share of dates and relationships, and probably plenty more to come. Some good ones, where I hit it off with the person right away, and others where I generally wanted to turn and run away as fast as I could. And although being an intuitive makes dating slightly more difficult, it comes in handy in saving my time and my date's time, when I just 'know' and feel when something just is or isn't their romantically with an individual, even just after one date. As my teacher and friend once said, " If you ever want to clear a room of men, just tell them your psychic. smile ladies.
As many of my friends who have found their romantic love have said, "When you know, you know." To illustrate, one of my close friends knew she was going to marry her husband...when they met at the ripe age of 4! She said, "I just knew he was my future husband then and there at the age of 4, I can't really explain how I knew, I just knew." And despite the other directions they took in life, the universe GPS'ed them back together at an appropriate marrying age, and they now have two wonderful children together. (Often times these couples have had past-lives together as husband and wife before in other life times, or some other close relationship like siblings).
Other times I have had experiences where I've felt a strong magnetic attraction to someone and things started off extremely well, only to have the relationship end pretty roughly. People think well your psychic shouldn't you know this would end badly? Trust me people, I wonder that too!
These instant magnetic attractions are usually karmic relationships. Karmic relationships serve a significant purpose and role on a soul and human level. We usually have had past-lives with these individuals with similar themes before. Also many abusive relationships tend to be past-life based. And even if its just days, weeks, or years, the relationship time with this person is to teach certain lessons to you and you to them. These lessons take place on a soul level and on the everyday now human level. Often times as these lessons or roles are played out in this lifetime, triggers occur for an individual to choose to keep going in the pattern or choose self-growth, self-realization, and as this begins to occur the relationship usually begins to unravel, usually for the better.
Or in some circumstances, especially in cases of nasty divorces, if one partner refuses to drop his/her end of the rope either financially or emotionally,and keeps trying to pull the other person back, sometimes the lesson is for the pulled individual to stand-up for oneself and set a boundary to not be pulled back into the relationship. Again, these are usually heavy past-life relationships that are attempting to resolve and rebalance again in this lifetime.
Often times, we'll keep attracting the same kind of people or themes over and over and over until the lessons are learned.
How do we know the lesson has been learned? Because its stop repeating, or swinging back and forth between extremes, and Balance is attained.
Furthermore, when I'm giving a reading and Spirit is speaking through me to answer a clients romantic love questions, it suddenly become clear. All the angst, self-doubt, and gray area that people are experiencing in regards to their love lives is lifted. Sometimes what comes through is satisfying for the client, usually because Spirit is telling them something they are happy to hear such as: Their partner respects and loves them, and is deeply loyal.
And other times the information that Spirit brings through is more sobering. Information that may take the client some time to process and accept. Sometimes its that their partner is probably not going to change, and they are who they are, which leads us into Free Will.
The key to any reading but particularly relationship readings and relationships overall is FREE WILL. For example, a girl or guy calls for a reading. We do the reading and some sobering information in regards to their significant other comes through, I deliver the information, and they ask me, "So...Should I break up with my boyfriend or girlfriend?" In response, I ask, "What do you want?" "Do you think you should?" The initiative must go in the client's decision making court no matter what the circumstances. And truly at the end of the day, whatever a client decides to do with the information they receive from Spirit is completely up to them.
Again, I'm not an expert, but I feel and know intuitively that navigating the high-seas of dating/romance are much easier when you:
- Follow your heart, your gut, and your OWN mind of what you want, need, and desire in your life.
And know that all of these work together all at once on the intuitive level.
-Ask your Angels and the Universe/God to assist in your love life.
It can't hurt right? We're allowed to have little pep talks with God and say,"Hey God, I hope all is well, by the way could you stop sending me x,y,z, flaw of persons I've dated, because it's really getting old. The next guy you send, send that One, and make sure he is awesome in every way."
- Trust that you'll be answered (maybe just not on your timetable, but that can be requested too,can't hurt right).
-No amount of dating books, amount of dates, or friend's advice -replaces your own innate intuition of the way you feel (or don't feel) about someone.
- Sometimes your heart may lead you into something for learning and growth, which may later leave it feeling broken, disappointed, grieving, and angry...at least for a Time.
In Time- you heal, you grow, you make questionable choices, take risks, face fears, feel alone, buy a fish, drink too much wine, take up knitting, begin scheming for world domination..
... and later meet or re-meet someone where you know,when you know.
... (And you'll have acquired a fish, have drunken some really good wine, maybe finished the knitting, and met someone to help you take over the world).
"We're all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them, and fall into a mutually satisfying weirdness and call it love, true love." - Dr. Seuss.
But what about the nitty-gritty stuff? .The deep-down romance and the soul-baring emotional talks. The ups and downs of romantic love. The love that can one moment make us say, do, and feel things that we've never felt or done before, and the next moment drive us up the wall with frustration, resentment, and anger.
Isn't it great? (smile).
But often times when I get calls to do an intuitive readings. Some of the top questions I'm asked are in regard to romantic relationships:
Is the man or woman I'm currently seeing a good match for me?
Is my soul mate out there?
Where is Mr./Mrs. Right (And why haven't they shown up yet?)
When is my significant other going to be ready to "take the next step?"
How come I keep attracting losers and/or people who are emotionally unavailable?
Is he or she going to ever change their mind on X issue or habit?
Will I ever find love?
How I come feel strongly drawn to this individual? Like a magnetic attraction?
Honestly, I can't even pretend to be a dating "expert." Like many out there, I've read my fair share of books on dating. The books tell you what to do, what not to do, when to call, when not to call, to text or not to text, who text who first, how many dates to go on per week, red flags, what it means when he says this or that, and now there is online dating which is a whole world unto itself ....it all gets very confusing and perplexing.
Also, I've had my fair share of dates and relationships, and probably plenty more to come. Some good ones, where I hit it off with the person right away, and others where I generally wanted to turn and run away as fast as I could. And although being an intuitive makes dating slightly more difficult, it comes in handy in saving my time and my date's time, when I just 'know' and feel when something just is or isn't their romantically with an individual, even just after one date. As my teacher and friend once said, " If you ever want to clear a room of men, just tell them your psychic. smile ladies.
As many of my friends who have found their romantic love have said, "When you know, you know." To illustrate, one of my close friends knew she was going to marry her husband...when they met at the ripe age of 4! She said, "I just knew he was my future husband then and there at the age of 4, I can't really explain how I knew, I just knew." And despite the other directions they took in life, the universe GPS'ed them back together at an appropriate marrying age, and they now have two wonderful children together. (Often times these couples have had past-lives together as husband and wife before in other life times, or some other close relationship like siblings).
Other times I have had experiences where I've felt a strong magnetic attraction to someone and things started off extremely well, only to have the relationship end pretty roughly. People think well your psychic shouldn't you know this would end badly? Trust me people, I wonder that too!
These instant magnetic attractions are usually karmic relationships. Karmic relationships serve a significant purpose and role on a soul and human level. We usually have had past-lives with these individuals with similar themes before. Also many abusive relationships tend to be past-life based. And even if its just days, weeks, or years, the relationship time with this person is to teach certain lessons to you and you to them. These lessons take place on a soul level and on the everyday now human level. Often times as these lessons or roles are played out in this lifetime, triggers occur for an individual to choose to keep going in the pattern or choose self-growth, self-realization, and as this begins to occur the relationship usually begins to unravel, usually for the better.
Or in some circumstances, especially in cases of nasty divorces, if one partner refuses to drop his/her end of the rope either financially or emotionally,and keeps trying to pull the other person back, sometimes the lesson is for the pulled individual to stand-up for oneself and set a boundary to not be pulled back into the relationship. Again, these are usually heavy past-life relationships that are attempting to resolve and rebalance again in this lifetime.
Often times, we'll keep attracting the same kind of people or themes over and over and over until the lessons are learned.
How do we know the lesson has been learned? Because its stop repeating, or swinging back and forth between extremes, and Balance is attained.
Furthermore, when I'm giving a reading and Spirit is speaking through me to answer a clients romantic love questions, it suddenly become clear. All the angst, self-doubt, and gray area that people are experiencing in regards to their love lives is lifted. Sometimes what comes through is satisfying for the client, usually because Spirit is telling them something they are happy to hear such as: Their partner respects and loves them, and is deeply loyal.
And other times the information that Spirit brings through is more sobering. Information that may take the client some time to process and accept. Sometimes its that their partner is probably not going to change, and they are who they are, which leads us into Free Will.
The key to any reading but particularly relationship readings and relationships overall is FREE WILL. For example, a girl or guy calls for a reading. We do the reading and some sobering information in regards to their significant other comes through, I deliver the information, and they ask me, "So...Should I break up with my boyfriend or girlfriend?" In response, I ask, "What do you want?" "Do you think you should?" The initiative must go in the client's decision making court no matter what the circumstances. And truly at the end of the day, whatever a client decides to do with the information they receive from Spirit is completely up to them.
Again, I'm not an expert, but I feel and know intuitively that navigating the high-seas of dating/romance are much easier when you:
- Follow your heart, your gut, and your OWN mind of what you want, need, and desire in your life.
And know that all of these work together all at once on the intuitive level.
-Ask your Angels and the Universe/God to assist in your love life.
It can't hurt right? We're allowed to have little pep talks with God and say,"Hey God, I hope all is well, by the way could you stop sending me x,y,z, flaw of persons I've dated, because it's really getting old. The next guy you send, send that One, and make sure he is awesome in every way."
- Trust that you'll be answered (maybe just not on your timetable, but that can be requested too,can't hurt right).
-No amount of dating books, amount of dates, or friend's advice -replaces your own innate intuition of the way you feel (or don't feel) about someone.
- Sometimes your heart may lead you into something for learning and growth, which may later leave it feeling broken, disappointed, grieving, and angry...at least for a Time.
In Time- you heal, you grow, you make questionable choices, take risks, face fears, feel alone, buy a fish, drink too much wine, take up knitting, begin scheming for world domination..
... and later meet or re-meet someone where you know,when you know.
... (And you'll have acquired a fish, have drunken some really good wine, maybe finished the knitting, and met someone to help you take over the world).
"We
are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find
someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them
and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love." - Dr. Seuss - See more
at:
http://www.chacha.com/question/what-is-the-dr.seuss-quote-about-weirdness#sthash.v2StY6xS.dpuf
"We
are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find
someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them
and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love." - Dr. Seuss - See more
at:
http://www.chacha.com/question/what-is-the-dr.seuss-quote-about-weirdness#sthash.v2StY6xS.dpuf
"We're all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them, and fall into a mutually satisfying weirdness and call it love, true love." - Dr. Seuss.
"We
are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find
someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them
and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love." - See more at:
http://www.chacha.com/question/what-is-the-dr.seuss-quote-about-weirdness#sthash.v2StY6xS.dpuf
"We
are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find
someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them
and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love." - Dr. Seuss - See more
at:
http://www.chacha.com/question/what-is-the-dr.seuss-quote-about-weirdness#sthash.v2StY6xS.dpuf
Saturday, November 30, 2013
Hypnosis 101: What is it? How Does It Work? And What Is the Benefit?
Many people are curious and fascinated by hypnosis. However those same often have reservations, misconceptions, and an overall picture of a person standing over someone with a pendulum telling the subject they will become very sleepy and to do whatever the hypnotist says. For others it is simply getting past the word itself Hypnosis” (Bolduc).
Interesting fact: there are hypnotists that use the pendulum technique (it is real!) and there are many who do not. (Full disclosure: I don’t). What many people think is hypnosis is actually “stage hypnosis”. Stage hypnosis meant purely for entertainment and fun; it is real, and it is pretty cool!
In contrast, hypnotherapy has a long track record of helping clients lose weight, develop more self-confidence, helping police solve crimes, healing past-lives, and healing inner child trauma; making hypnosis a powerful healing and transformative therapeutic tool for the mind, body, and spirit.
Probably the most common misconception of hypnosis is that the hypnotist has control over the subject. This is why many hypnotherapists term achieving a hypnotic state as going “into hypnosis” versus being “under hypnosis”; it is to reassure the client that there is no one “over” them.
Another concern almost all clients have is revealing any inner dark secrets or embarrassing tidbits about themselves. Fact: it is impossible for someone to behave in a way against their own free will, and/or reveal secrets in a state of hypnosis because:
1) In reality at the end of the day all hypnosis is self-hypnosis. Believe it or not, people go into states of hypnosis every day whether they’re aware of it or not. The two most immediate examples are during long highway driving or becoming engrossed in a book.
2)Whether it’s stage hypnosis or hypnotherapy, the same axiom exists: the subject has willingly has agreed to walk on stage and be an active participant, or has voluntarily made an appointment and come with 100% free will to make a shift in their lives, and the client has made the choice that he or she does not want certain personal information exposed.
3) Furthermore, the client has full control over how deep into hypnosis he or she wants to go. Hypothetically, if I had total and complete control “over” my clients, they’d all be dropping weight in three days and never pick up a cigarette again!
4) At the end of the day it’s all based on free will. Hypnosis cannot take away one’s free will since it is the will of the person’s mind who is allowing them to go into hypnosis in the first place.
I often am asked HOW is hypnosis done? How do I hypnotize someone?
My style of hypnosis is taking my clients through guided-visual imagery and breathing techniques and guiding clients to basically get out of their own way. The conscious mind-Ego is a wonderful driver and ambitious, however it can also hinder us. So, while going into hypnosis I’m temporarily asking the client to give their conscious mind a break, so their subconscious can step up and absorb the suggestions being spoken. The subconscious is where all are true desires lie and it is also where we hold all our own answers.
There is no right or wrong way to help someone achieve a hypnotic state; it’s just a matter of the hypnotherapists’ training, background, and style.
For instance, a popular and effective method of inducing a subject into hypnosis is having the client imagine a set of stairs, in which each step represents a deeper and deeper level of relaxation. Or if a client has a step-phobia I would take them through a more well-suited guided visualization.
So if all hypnosis is self-hypnosis what exactly is the role of the “hypnotherapist”?
I once had a mentor tell me that I “...wasn’t qualified to be doing hypnosis, since I didn’t have a degree in psychology”, and they “...wouldn’t trust someone who didn’t to hypnotize them…” Admittedly, this stung a bit and I was rather stunned, and was unsure how to process these statements since it came from an individual I respect and trusted. However, it got my wheels turning. What makes hypnotherapy different from a general mainstream therapist? And what and how makes someone “qualified”? A degree? Is it truly the letters behind their name? Or is the percentage they scored on the passing exam? Or is it something deeper than that?
In response, my teacher and mentor, Dr. Allen Chips, dubbed as the “Hypno Buddha” in the Hypnosis community, described that the relationship between client and transpersonal hypnotherapist as, “Divine, it is a relationship of personal growth for both therapist and client, and each client brought through the door is brought by higher forces.” That being said if you feel called to pursue the work of hypnosis then pursue it for your own self -healing and others. The clients that walk through the door are clients who are drawn to you on some level, like attracting like. And as always you trust your intuition by knowing and exercising your limitations.
Furthermore, the hypnotherapist’s role (in my belief) is as follows:
1) Hold sacred space for their client one hundred percent of the time with the highest intention of good. This space is held from the time the client walks in the door and fills out an intake form to the time the client is putting their shoes back on and walking out my door.
2) I’m simply guide, a facilitator. Sometimes people think the therapist does all the work and if the client isn’t losing weight or achieving a particular goal/end result right away, it is something at fault with the therapist. In my belief there is equal exchange of energy between the client and hypnotherapist that is taking place while they are in session. I truly believe and have seen with my own eyes that a hypnotherapist who shows up with 100% focus attention and is on their “A-game” for their client will generally tend to have a client is 100% satisfied with their session.
And sometimes holding 100% sacred space for a client has even means being 100% honest, and referring them out to someone who is a better fit. For example, I had a couple who came into my office for fertility and conception. After explaining to me their situation, I realized this couple was not for me. Not because they were bad people, or anything of that matter. However, I knew in my heart I would not be able to hold 100% sacred space for this couple in their journey to conceiving. I had myself have no children (yet) and am not in that phase of my life where I could begin to understand the complexities of fertility. So, I was honest with myself and my client and referred them out. As a result, they found a hypnotherapist who specialized in hypno-birthing and are doing extremely well.
At the end of the day, I firmly believe a divine and personal rapport is established between hypnotherapist and client, a powerful and transformative exchange of energy for both parties.
Is hypnosis for everyone?
I’ll be honest, I’m not sure. Optimistically, I want to say yes it is! The most recent research says that 91% of the population is susceptible to hypnosis. However, it is important to acknowledge that not everyone who tried hypnosis is satisfied with the end result. When people are ready to do try hypnosis and make the change, they’re ready, plain and simple.
To illustrate, when I have spouses or significant others call on behalf of their partner, I tend to hold a strict policy that their spouse must make their own appointment and if they’re ready to talk to call me. People may think Geez Meredith, why’re such a hard-nose about this? It’s rooted in my belief when people are ready to do their OWN healing, they’ll make the call and make their own appointment. It is simply a waste of the spouse’s time and my time, if they really don’t want to be there in the first place, since actively they’re not coming upon their own free will, but rather another’s will. And let’s get real time is valuable.
Success rates?
I don’t believe in success rates because in my opinion each client is unique and there is no one-size fits all formula. As Henry Leo Bolduc stated, “Hypnosis is like love, everyone experiences it differently.” For example, some people feel and see immediate results in themselves after a session, while others may take more sessions over a longer period of time. And then there are the rare times when a client has declared they’ve had zero benefits from hypnosis for various reasons. This is usually due to lack of rapport or trust, or they in reality didn’t really want to be there in the first place, hence my strict ‘spouse must call and make own appointment’ policy.
Why Hypnotherapy, what makes it beneficial?
Hypnotherapy is not “therapy” in the mainstream sense that it’s thought of, and it has many therapeutic benefits. Often times, hypnotherapy is a client’s last resort when they’ve generally exhausted all other options. It should be noted that during the initial client interview of the first session the interview can often run like a general ‘talk therapy’ session.
Benefit 1) Many people report feeling grounded, calm, and centered, and really relaxed after a hypnosis session. Living in the Washington DC area, this is always nice to hear from a client!
Benefit 2) Every 1 hour of hypnosis is an equivalent to three hours of deep REM sleep (Bennet).
Benefit 3) Although talk therapy has many benefits and is valuable, clients can move into the past via hypnosis and partake in deep healing on a super conscious and subconscious level. Often times clients are able to resolve an issue that generally would’ve been 15 years of talk therapy in a few sessions of hypnosis.
Benefit 4) Hypnotic regression allows clients to go to the origin of an issue whether it be emotional, mental, physical, or spiritual. Often times in the acknowledgment of the root cause comes healing on various levels.
Benefit 5) Hypnotherapy if done by a certified hypnotherapist only, does not count as “therapy” therefore if you have a security clearance or work in a profession where going to a psychologist or therapist would affect job qualifications, hypnosis puts you and your paycheck in the clear.
To Learn More About Hypnotherapy
Suggested Reading
- Clinical Hypnotherapy: A Transpersonal Approach By Dr. Allen Chips.
- Self-Hypnosis By Henry Leo Bolduc
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